As a business humor writer, Bob Goldman believes that his readers should skyrocket ahead in their careers and make tons of money. What sets Bob apart is his belief that his readers should have these advantages without going to trouble of actually having to do any work. Toward this end, he provides the practical tips and attitude adjustments that guarantee laughter, if not financial success.
Born in White Plains, N.Y., Bob graduated from Colorado College. Using the writing skills he honed while not doing any schoolwork, he crafted an essay that gained him admission to the prestigious University of Chicago School of Business. Intent on proving his success-without-effort philosophy, Bob ended his first semester with four F's and one D, prompting his adviser to comment, "You obviously spent too much time on one subject." Sensing that his gifts might be better applied to the practical world of business, Bob left the ivory tower to become a successful advertising copywriter at huge multinational firms in whose bureaucratic superstructure he always found a place to hang his hat--and his hammock.
In between writing ads for detergent and computers, he found time to write articles for The New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, GQ and Rolling Stone. His column, Work Daze, is a finger in the eye for business blowhards and boardroom braggarts.
The father of three children, Bob lives near San Francisco in a newly remodeled house for which he will be paying for many happy decades to come.
There is another tragically overweight person whose honesty and integrity is a matter of vital concern to us. Not Chris Christie. That's right, friend. I'm talking about you.
Sorry, prettykittyselfies.com, I have a new favorite website. It's tinybuddha.com, and I think you're going to love it as much as I do.
It was a dark day indeed when businesses started thinking about their employees as people and not numbers. Being a number was wonderful, even if your number was zero! A number is anonymous.
Talk about weird! The CEO of Lululemon, the trendy manufacturer of trendy athletic gear, has resigned over a few innocent remarks. What did ex-CEO Chip Wilson say that was so terrible?
I assumed that when a manager pops up in your face to ask if you would rather stop complaining and keep your job, or quit and feed your family off government cheese, the responses would be 100 percent accurate.
Those of us who are tall, good-looking, over 40, white and male rarely have trouble being perceived as leaders. In our society, "people of the historically dominant race and gender, and a respected age, are typically afforded higher status than everyone else," say two business school professors, Adam D. Galinsky and Gavin J. Kilduff, in a recent article on group behavior in the Harvard Business Review.
Bad news. After all the effort you have put into becoming the perfect "low- profile" employee, who nobody knows or notices, it turns out the people you see getting ahead are the ones you see. Period.
I want you to share my outrage over a group of people who are not satisfied with getting a paycheck; they also expect to get free beer, free massages, free housecleaning services, free laundry, free food, and -- oh, yes -- free access to on-site "napping stations."
I am getting tired of having colleagues getting out the paddles and trying to start my heart simply because I've been slumped over my keyboard for a couple of hours.
Let's be honest here, Haden is not describing you. When you walk into a room, it not only doesn't light up. It feels like the entire North American power grid has gone down.
If you think it's difficult to work in an office, imagine how hard it is to work at home.
It really breaks your heart, doesn't it? It just makes me sad to think that I'm living in a world where not everyone is enjoying the non-stop joy that comes from spending days, weeks, years and decades trapped in a soul-killing office full of annoying co-workers and abusive supervisors.
It used to be that you criticized people at work for being "holier than thou." Now, the most stinging criticism you can make about a co-worker is that they're "happier than thou."