- Spending money: Spouses should be equal partners regardless of who makes more money, and retirees (along with stay-at-home moms or dads) shouldn't feel impoverished by the fact that they're not bringing home the bacon. Make things equitable by adopting one of these tactics. Each spouse contributes equal amounts to a joint account for household and shared expenses, then uses the leftover income for personal, discretionary spending. Or both spouses funnel all their income into a joint account and pay themselves an "allowance" each month for personal spending.
- Household responsibilities: It's a fact, unfortunately, that women in two-career families do more work around the house than their husbands. But I believe that the retiring spouse, regardless of gender, has to be willing to step up and play a more active role in the management of the household.
- Stay engaged: This is advice for the retiree. Find something to engage your energies, particularly if you're retiring early and in good health (but really, it's good advice at any age). Retirements can last a long time today, and you need to be prepared for what some people are calling the "Second Stage" of life. This could mean working part time or consulting in a former profession; volunteering or taking up a new activity, or even embarking on a second career. Of course a retiree is entitled to some leisure, that's what retirement is about. Don't let inertia set in; you'll be unhappy and so will your spouse.
- Keep talking: This is probably the most important piece of advice for Anna and Max. There is no question that Max's retirement represents a major shift not only for Max, but for Anna and Max's marriage as well. This couple is fortunate in that they are financially secure. In order to continue operating as a close couple, they need to support each other emotionally. Max is retiring now, but Anna will face similar decisions in a few years. I firmly believe that communication and respect are the key to making this (or any other life transition) successful.
I realize that for many people the question of what to do in retirement will take a back seat to the question of how to pay for it. You know my answer to that one: save, save, save; invest, invest, invest. Everyone can make retirement a lot easier financially simply by working longer.
For a growing number of Americans, the transition from career to retirement raises a lot of non-financial issues as well. Talk about them with your spouse or partner so that both of you can get the most out of your retirement years.
